Would this sound better in Nanaimo?

"Your husband won't be an A-hole in Nanaimo!"

Ev's always wanted to live in Nanaimo. For all my non-Canadian friends, Nanaimo is a city located on Vancouver Island. According to Ev, it is an enchanted island with unicorns, talking whales, and beer-filled lakes. Ev's never been to Nanaimo. He doesn't even know anyone who lives there; he has, however, studied it excessively on the internet whilst ;) consuming Nanaimo bars. So he's pretty much a psycho expert. When we lived in Calgary (dark, dark days, my friends), Ev and I desperately searched for a new locale to where we could relocate. I was rooting for Prince Albert (friends and family), while Ev marketed Nanaimo to the max. He watched "The Island" news on our satellite TV, reporting back at the end of the day, "No crime in Nanaimo. Just wine festivals." He researched the housing market, "Look, we could live here! Ocean view from our roof. We can watch the whales!" He found lakes on which we would wakesurf year-round, "This one is next to a vineyard. We can wakesurf, then swim to shore and drink wine!" To be honest, I was sold. Let's move to Nanaimo! Problem: No jobs for either of us. Case closed. Contrary to what Ev would have anyone believe, you do require money - even in Nanaimo -  to pursue the good life.

So here we are, 2 years later, living a lovely life in PA. Neither of us regret the move - but...life is life. Some days are shitty (no matter where you live, right?) Wrong. Ev continues to maintain that Nanaimo is the utopia of the world. The epicenter of awesomeness. Dare I complain (about anything), Ev reminds me (constantly) that we chose to forgo the Nanaimo dream of eternal happiness and move to PA (where shitty things sometimes happen).

Example 1:
My coffee mug slips out of my hands, spilling tea everywhere...

Me: "Shit!"

Ev: "That wouldn't happen in Nanaimo."

Example 2:
I'm attempting to relay some super important news to Ev; however, he's all wrapped up in one of his lamo money books, "Found money - Simple Strategies for Uncovering the Hidden Profit and Cash flow in your Business" (boooooring).

Me: "Why won't you just listen to me?"

Ev: "I would be a much better listener - in Nanaimo." (How do you not crack up?)

Example 3:
Ev has even programmed the Nanaimo weather forecast into his iphone. One August day, as the wind howls and the waves crash over our boat, completely kaiboshing any dreams of wakesurfing, Ev checks the Nanaimo forecast on his iphone and proclaims, "3km winds in Nanaimo. Perfect day for wakesurfing."

So this is what I'm dealing with.

Yesterday, as I hyperventilated "Ode to Misery Joy" on the prescious flute, I admittendly pondered, "Would this sound better in Nanaimo?"

You know what? It doesn't matter. We are not living in Nanaimo. It is what it is. The flute and I only have 18 more days left together. Let's just enjoy it. In the words of "Trooper" (ever notice how PA radio LOOOVES Trooper?), "We're here for a good time, not a long time."
So, flute and I are gonna rip it up in PA...because we ain't in Nanaimo, princess.